I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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