i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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