He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
All I want is dick and wine.
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