If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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