it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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