i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
