Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
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