Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
