she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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