Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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