bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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