i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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