A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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