Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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