I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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