I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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