Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
