I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
