Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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