The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
i dont even know how to be here
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
