I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
