if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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