Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize
