Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
