Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
