You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
