well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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