It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
