I want to stick my p in your. b.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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