their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
