I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
