Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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