Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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