is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Randomize
