You smell like a Billy Joel song
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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