If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
