so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
