Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
