RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
