Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Randomize
