how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Even my vagina gasped.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
