if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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