Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
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