But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
this just has baby written all over it
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Randomize
