mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Naked. naked and bneed help.
The struggles of a small town man whore
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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