your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
