Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
