I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
