Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
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