): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize